If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Randomize
