well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
