It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
