You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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