SEEEEXXX PLEASE
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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