i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
