In America we eat man semen.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Shame - the story of my life.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
