i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
