What a fucking waste of an outfit
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
