What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
