i just had sex bonerless
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
