She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
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