I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
