I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
