Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize