just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
