I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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