Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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