there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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