so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
