This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
