guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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