I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Randomize
