his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
