Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
