i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize