you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
