We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
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