ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Randomize
