i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
you made out with another girl for some wings
Randomize
