I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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