Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
