If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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