16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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