Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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