why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
