the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
