Rock
Scissors
Fuck
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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