I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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