I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
