He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
