I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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