I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
