so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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