I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
