What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
