Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
