Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
