I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
