How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
