there's paper in my vomit.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize